Knights of the Old Republic
Submitted Monday, December 8, 2003 - 11:50:45 AM by Klaitu

I've been trying this game out here and there during the holiday season, so I've decided to give it it's own review here.

Knights of the Old Republic sets you in the Star Wars universe 4,000 years before the rise of the Empire. Shortly after the Mandalorian war, the Sith have begun their assault on the galaxy. It's your job, of course, to stop him.

With a game called "Knights of the Old Republic" you might expect there to be Jedi. Don't bet on it. You won't be able to even play a Jedi at first. You have to get to the second planet first. That's right, you have to play it for 4 hours before you even talk to a Jedi.

The game starts with you in your underwear in your cabin, the room shakes, and a guy runs in. You can ask him questions like "Who are you?" and "Where am I?". I dunno the backstory, but one would assume that you would know that you're on a ship and recognize your roommate.

Looks like you've "got to save Bastila" In the first little side-mission alone, you will hear the name "Bastila" 4 million times. So, you're rushed through this maze..err..I mean ship in search of Batista. Turns out she's already escaped in an escape pod. Gee, nobody saw that coming or anything. We really expected to complete the objective in the training level.

Alright, so you escape the ship and land on the planet below. Suprise! It's a Coruscant rip-off! The whole planet is one big city, the lower part is a slum, and the richey riches live up top. Oh, I think I was here before when it was called NAR SHADDAA.

I'll give you a cookie if you can guess where Bastila lands. Yep, you guessed it.. she landed in the bottommost part of the city, and apparently crashed directly into the jail cell of a gang leader. You know, because a Jedi can't fight off a couple bikers.

So, you run through all the mazes.. oh, I mean quests and you do some overly derivative things (go to X, pick up Y, take it to Z for a reward). After some hours of repetitive gameplay, you will finally participate in the "super dangerous nobody-finishes-the-race-alive Swoop Bike Race". So, you hop in the cockpit and get ready for an intriguing race.

WHOOPS! It's not a race, it's a time trial. Oh, and remember when we told you about the dangerous obstacle-filled course? Well, it's not really a course, it's straight.. oh, and there's no obstacles in it.

All this is good, though, because you can rescue Bastila without breaking a sweat. Oh, I almost forgot.. why is it you're trying to rescue her? Because she's apparently some amazing Master Jedi with Battle Meditation (read: BS) force powers.

Alright, so you let her out of her cage, and discover that she has a yellow double-bladed lightsaber at her disposal. Wow, this is going to be neat! I have a Jedi on my team now, I don't need anyone else!

Yeah, whoops, when I said "Jedi" I meant "Character class designed to be fair to the other classes". Bastila is incredibly unimpressive. She takes at least 5 or 6 swings to kill even the most simple creatures. What about those awesome Battle Meditation powers she can wield? Oh, they're imaginary and can't actually help you. Shame.

So, after you rescue her, you have do to a couple other puzzles.. oh, I mean quests, sorry. And you can finally escape the first planet.. just as it is destroyed by a fleet of Sith warships.

During the cutscene we get to see the bad guy for the first time. He's this half-cybernetic evil-jedi sith guy who talks in a metallic voice and bosses everyone around with fear. We haven't seen THAT before in a Star Wars game/movie/book. The bad guy is SO original! Oh, and get this, he is the APPRENTICE to another, even more evil master. All this seems terribly familiar.

Oh, and THEN you become a Jedi..

Coincidentally, You know in the Star Wars movies where you have to start the path of the Jedi when you're like 3.. you know, the movies where they rejected 9 year old Anakin Skywalker because he was too old. Well, apparently that dosen't apply to Kyle Katarn from Jedi Academy, nor your character in KOTOR. "What? He's an adult.. oh well, we'll train him anyways" They even fall back on the old cliche of "The force is strong with this one, It's amazing, I have never seen anything like this before!"

Alright, let me nutshell it for you!

Pros:
- The game is fun
- The animations are great
- There's lots of playtime involved with the game
- Voice acting is pretty good
- Your dialog choices determine what side of the force you're on

Cons:
- It's based on Dungeons and Dragons (go figure)
- It uses the NWN-style of play
- Controls are clumsy and hard to learn
- No toolbar
- Graphics settings cannot be customized
- Game is choppy, can't control characters when FPS drops below 2
- Combat is lacking
- AI is horrible
- Story is derivative and unengaging
- sound quality is weak
- sound balance is horrible
- Character Customization is a joke
- Weapons are drawn all the time, even when in a peaceful city, a jedi temple, or just out shopping
- Lightsabers are severely messed up. It sometimes takes 10 or 11 swings to kill a DROID
- Too many mazes
- Jedi powers are stupid and hokey
- Inventory system is clumsy
- Item classes are not clearly defined
- Made by Bioware

Now, I played the PC version. I can see how this would be a GREAT console game. The controls really make a lot more sense in that context, and also you wouldn't have to plod through the game a 2 FPS. If I played the xbox version, this review might be a different story, but it still wouldn't fix the plot problems.

My Overall Rating: 4 of 10. If you really liked Neverwinter Nights, seek professional help for your taste in games, and then go play KOTOR. It's better than NWN, but only just barely. It has the same clumsy interface, overpolygoned models, and derivative story. If you're really into Star Wars, you might want it too.